Control | Proverbs 14:12
As we step into our new Lenten sermon series, “Giving Up,” I want to challenge you to consider that maybe God is not calling you to give up coffee, sweets, or social media for Lent. Instead, perhaps He is calling you to give up something far more significant: control.
The Illusion of Control
From an early age, we develop a desire for control. If you've ever raised a toddler, you know this all too well. The so-called "terrible twos" are marked by children testing the limits, pushing boundaries, and exerting their will. And if we’re honest, many of us never fully grow out of those tendencies.
We want control over our families, our careers, our finances, our relationships, and even our futures. And when things don’t go our way, we often respond with frustration, anxiety, and even spiritual temper tantrums. But the reality is that the very thing we grasp for—control—is the very thing God is calling us to release.
A Way That Seems Right
Proverbs 14:12 says, “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.”
We convince ourselves that our way is the best way. We believe that if we plan enough, strategize enough, and work hard enough, we can ensure the outcomes we desire. But the Bible warns us that trusting in our own way ultimately leads to destruction.
The irony is that the more we try to seize control, the more we actually lose it. Jesus Himself tells us in Matthew 16:25, “For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.”
Signs of a Control Struggle
You might be thinking, “I don’t struggle with control.” But let me offer a few signs that might reveal otherwise:
Do you have a hard time delegating? You may justify it by saying you don’t want to burden others, but in reality, you want control.
Do you get moody when you’re not the one calling the shots? This is adult-sized temper tantrum behavior.
Do you micromanage people who don’t even work for you? That’s a clear sign of control issues.
Do you constantly criticize others? Sometimes, we critique others simply because they have control that we want.
Do you resist following others’ directions? It’s easy to call yourself a leader, but sometimes, it’s just a need for control.
The Fruit of Control vs. The Fruit of Surrender
When we try to control everything, it leads to fear, stress, anger, deception, and even destruction. But when we surrender our lives to God, He gives us something far greater:
Galatians 5:22-23 describes the fruit of the Spirit—what happens when we let God take control:
Love – Control is rooted in fear, but perfect love drives out fear.
Joy – True joy is found in trusting God, not in controlling outcomes.
Peace – Anxiety fades when we release our worries to Him.
Patience – We can wait with hope instead of frustration.
Kindness & Goodness – A surrendered heart overflows with generosity.
Faithfulness – Trusting God’s plan leads to steadfast faith.
Gentleness – We don’t have to force our way when we trust His way.
Self-Control – Ironically, true self-control comes when we surrender to God’s control.
The Call to Give Up
We were not created for control. We were created to concede—to surrender our way to God’s way. As we journey through Lent, let’s consider what we truly need to give up. What if, instead of giving up chocolate or TV, we gave up the illusion of control?
When we give control to God, we don’t lose our lives—we find them. Let’s take this season to trust Him more fully, surrender more completely, and walk in the freedom that comes from letting go.
Are you willing to give up control?
